STRAIGHT OR GAY

STRAIGHT OR GAY

The nosy neighbor or incredulous relative asks, “Are you gay?”

“What’s it to you what I am!,” you scream in your head, but shrug your shoulders and walk away. Or worse, you lie.  

Who is to say what is right or wrong and how we should lead our lives? How can we discriminate and differentiate against people on the basis of their colour, their religion, their job or even more so, their sexual orientation.

Movies and television series have tried to touch upon and unravel LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) issues, but what has the impact really been?

Hollywood has given us brilliant movies highlighting the plight of gay and transgender individuals like Boys don’t cry, Transamerica and A girl like me.

While two of these films were true stories and one pure fiction, each of them was believable and real in how they captured the conflict in a person’s mind when dealing with their sexual identity and standing up to society. American and British television is not far behind with a wide spectrum of work like Queer as Folk, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and several others.

While international cinema has brought upon a tremendous change in the understanding and level of tolerance towards the LGBT community, what does Indian Cinema have to offer? Save a few and far in between projects like My Brother Nikhil, at best, most movies and TV shows dealing with homosexuality and transgender issues are mediocre attempts at ridiculing a person just because they are not heterosexual! The representation of homosexuals in films like Kal ho na ho and Dostana are atrocious. The countless jokes on TV regarding homosexual characters only succeed in disgusting you. The LGBT community doesn’t take too well to straight people playing gay characters and feel that the projection and messaging is wrong.

Of course, we need to remind ourselves that the Indian Cinema is merely imitating the Indian society. We have the tendency to condemn what we don't understand. So why not take the time to understand it better rather than turn a blind eye!

What is even more depressing is that influential homosexuals in all walks of life, be it actors, filmmakers, fashion designers, educators or businessmen do not come forth and declare their identity or even lend support to others like themselves in society.

Nature chooses who we are; individuals don't choose this. There is always more to be learnt about tolerance, so let this be an eye opener so that if a loved one someday needs your support, you don’t shy away from it.

If living with pride and dignity and accepting and loving myself the way I am is wrong, then I don’t ever want to be right in my life.

Gym Life Beckons

Everyone comes to a crossroads in their life. Mine is now. Changing my career, taking control of my health, cultivating my hobbies and dealing with a married life, I’m making a valiant attempt to juggle all of the above, successfully.

This part is about me taking control of my health. Months of brisk walking didn’t help, my yoga classes are only thrice a week so in a desperate bid to get into shape, I have joined a gym. The first few days there, every moment was spent dreading the aches that would plague me for another ten days or so. But I’m glad to report that I’ve not chickened out, my stamina has improved and have tried my best to be regular with my workouts.

 It’s hard to not notice the characters in the gym. The baby faced teenager whose main goal is to turn the baby fat into muscle, the beefcake who comes to gym reeking of cheap perfume, the struggling actor who thinks working out will get them the part even if they don’t have the looks for it, the middle aged GI Jane trying to revive her youth and the bedroom eyes boy toy she keeps making googly eyes at. Aaaah, you gotta love the gym. 

Looking Married!!

So, let's just say that you do all the things you need to in life. You get a good job, great set of friends, make your family happy by getting married...but turns out that just ain't enough! Apparently being married somehow manages to change your equation with people drastically. Some are way too excited that you are married, treating you like you just got permanent residency in Neverland. Some (read Parents) expect you to suddenly have your entire life planned out starting with how many babies can you turn out in the next 5-6 years. Your friends now feel that they only need to share developments in their life, mundane or life altering, with just either one of you, cos let's face it, you live together, you'll let the other one know. Now you will meet these two very starnge sets of people - set A who feel like you just don't look married and set B who feel that you look SO MARRIED! Now what does this phrase mean?
I mean, if it's so important, should not every couple headed for marital bliss be handed a handbook as to what is the right measure of looking/not looking Married? While a friend or two may want to stop hanging out with you cos they now feel like, "you don't have time for your friends", yet others you meet will ask relatives, "are they yet to be married cos they just don't look married?". Honestly folks, what's the big deal anyway? And if it is really everything that it's made out to be.....where is that damn handbook?